theology&geometry

Memorial Day weekend was also the weekend my grandmother turned 78 years old. She’s my only remaining grandparent and I am working on the technology to allow her to live forever.

Freckleface and Gingerballs turned three years old on April 20. I simply cannot let the date of their birth pass without posting this picture, which I know I have posted on this blog before as a lolcat but which still cracks me up mightily, even sans words.

It’s really weird that I thought Jack was a girl back then. He grew up to be a big ol’ boy. And Sally is my little ninja. Right now they’re lounging on the pet beds in the office — Jack to my left and Sally to my right — just waiting for me to go to bed so they can either crank up their energy and stalk around the house like tiny psycho tigers OR sweetly get in bed with me and keep me warm. I never really know what they’ll be in the mood for from night to night. They like to keep it interesting that way.

Here’s to finally being out of those terrible twos!

If, for some reason, you find yourself unable to find any photographs of cats on the internet, might I direct you to this compilation?

Her birthday was actually Friday, but I’m wishing her a bloggy happy birthday as hard as I possibly can.

Happy birthday, Dad. Fifty-five years young.

But — and don’t tell anyone — he’s not really all that terrible at all.

[Project 365]

[Project 365]

Margaritas in celebration of mortality! I think A would delight in the darkness of that statement.

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Sassy as ever, she is.

[Project 365]

Yesterday was my dad’s 54th birthday. Everyone gathered at the new Mexican restaurant in Saltillo to eat, drink, and yell as loudly as we possibly could about the impossibility of pronouncing basic Mexican words for food.

It was a pretty good time, I have to say. Watching the brothers who run the place deal with the avalanche of crazy that comes with my family was fascinating. They were absolute professionals — no orders were botched, and we had chips and cheese dip and sweet tea and water refills coming like clockwork without ever demanding them. And they were super nice about all of it.

The servers were bringing out all the food and amid the fajitas and enchiladas and taco salads and beans and rice, they set down a hamburger and fries in front of my youngest nephew, Patrick. Everyone was all, “What is that?! You come to a Mexican restaurant and get a hamburger?” But our server, Adolfo, had Patrick’s back. “It’s a Mexican Big Mac!” he said before disappearing into the kitchen again.

My sister and I had schemed to surprise my mom with a cake and gifts too, since her birthday is the 12th. So after dinner, while we scurried out to the car to get the cake and stuff, we completely missed the restaurant staff coming out and singing to my sombrero-wearing father, which was kind of the one thing I was hoping to see yesterday. It’s okay, though, because my mother accidentally caught some of it on video.

Kahuna Grande from Lindsey Turner on Vimeo.

What she did not catch on video, however, was my brother mooning her as a way of saying “happy birthday.”

We coaxed Adolfo and Roger, a family friend, into taking a family picture for us. With five different cameras. Which took fifteen minutes. And was completely hilarious and chaotic. When it was time to pay up, I tipped heavily and thanked Adolfo and Jesus (both the Messiah and the dude at the restaurant) for putting up with all of us. They seemed happy to have the business but also a little relieved to see us suiting up and heading out. I mean, we unironically refer to ourselves as The Clampetts for a reason.

Full Flickr set here.

Eventually, when Vimeo deigns to process it, I’ll post a bonus video of everyone freaking out when some sizzling fajitas come out of the kitchen. And now, check out everyone in my family freaking out when the sizzling plate of fajita meat comes out!

IS THAT YERS?!?! from Lindsey Turner on Vimeo.

[Project 365]

In honor of my sister’s thirtysomethingth birthday today (she might string me up if I tell the whole internet her age), I have to share this photo.

This is one of the greatest pictures of all time. Not only is that blue and white outfit positively smashing, but the miniature VW Bug full of cigarettes adds some much needed surreality. I am obviously obsessively checking the top of my hair to make sure there are no weird lumps caused by my ponytail. And is that a busted fish tank in the background?