Television drinking games

• Watch Semi-Homemade Cooking With Sandra Lee. Take a shot of whisky every time she says “wonderful” or “beautiful.” Take two shots and punch yourself in the face every time she says “wonderful wonderful” or “beautiful beautiful.”

• Funnel a can of PBR every time you hear a Hum song in a car ad.

• Pour vodka in your ears every time that OxiClean/Kaboom dude comes on the screen and yells at you for no good reason.

• Drown yourself in wine every time Adrianne Curry belches or mentions her boobs.

C’mon, invent your own!

10 thoughts on “Television drinking games

  1. Take a shot every time Bret Michaels mentions how much something completely un-sexual kinda turns him on. Two shots every time he yells “Hi-yo!” in response to something that kinda turns him on.

  2. Snort a Jell-O shot every time wormy white guys try to get America’s fat ass to embrace a “Fourthmeal” by using a commercial that looks like a cut scene from Superbad.

  3. Ooh, ooh, and watch Everyday Italian with Giada de Laurentiis and down a Jager bomb every time she interrupts her normal American speech with a heavily-accented Italian word like, “MOATS-ahh-RrrrrRELLL-ah!”

  4. These are awesome. Keep ‘em coming! Me might soon have enough for a book, or at the very least, a niche blog!

  5. On the political tip, I’ve always been tempted to shoot whiskey whenever John McCain says “My friends.” Usually does it at least three times per sentence.

  6. Douse yourself in Everclear and light yourself on fire every time the Chevrolet President’s Day Sale barges onscreen and attempts to pimp out the “Hail to the Chief” tune. Ugh!

  7. (This is probably just local, but…)

    Mist tequila in your eyes every time the cracked-out blond lady in an 80′s power suit dazedly tries to get you to buy Ashley furniture.

  8. Thanks for the read, but I have a question, where do you see it in about one years time, do you see it changing at all, for the better or worse?

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