There is a spider just outside the front window. She is suspended on a single thread, bisecting it between the points where it is attached to the pane. She’s halfway between her origin and her destination, dangling and swaying back and forth in the breeze. She’s dead. Kicked ye olde bucket while making a go at another web: her first, seventh, dozenth, hundreth — who really even knows but her. There is just the one…
You will have to take my word for it. This thing was on our front porch for a few days. I never saw the spider because I’m assuming it lived ON TOP OF THE ENTIRE ROOF.
And that’s because she spazzed out and made some sick-looking movements, I guess because a grasshopper nearly got caught in the web. Dumbass. Anyway, this spider has been living just outside my front door, suspended between the coral bells and the lavender mums, for weeks now. I have left her alone. She lives just below my porch light so I imagine she eats pretty well. She has a companion of sorts (a kid?) who appears…
The way I see it, we’re BFFs automatically since I did not dispense with any smashing. Not that I could have with a hand or foot or rolled-up newspaper; this lovely beast is big enough to eat birds! Okay, maybe not. Anyway, it was perched ever so conspicuously next to my water hose all yesterday and then was gone today. SHUDDERBARF.
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