[Well that is that and this is this]

I’ve been hanging out with myself today. We’ve had a good time. We woke up early and went to the art museum. Gazed upon huge canvasses shellacked with tempera and oils and thread. Cowered beneath rusting metal heaps in the sculpture garden. Pondered the importance the bare breast has to classical art. Giggled at the Japanese, who have a great sense of humor that can be seen in their samaurai suits. Realized that my purse is way too frickin’ heavy.

There is nothing better than easing your way alone through a quiet museum on a Saturday morning, just you and the color and history. And that museum smell. I’m going to call and see what volunteer opportunities they have available. Maybe they’ll let me take out their artistic trash.

We had lunch at Al’s, which has quickly become my favorite eatery. I picked up a copy of Kaleidoscope, UAB’s student newspaper, and gawked. I don’t want to be an arrogant prick, but they look more like The Sword of the Lord than a real newspaper. If only the students of MTSU knew how good they have it.

David Sedaris is coming to Nashville Tuesday. I hope my cronies go and get some pictures and awkward anecdotes to share. Or shall we say anecdon’ts. Hoo ha. Of course, D.S. will be in B’ham in September. Could it be more perfect?

I’ve got a whole day left to explore. I had thought about scaling Red Mountain and cavorting with Vulcan, but I have no cash and he costs $6. Looks like I’m in for a night of writing, which suits me fine. I’m working on a story about this arrogant, obnoxious girl (it’s not an autobiography, OK) who pisses off everyone around her by being the biggest jerk ever. But it’s funny. It’s my homage to A Confederacy of Dunces, but if I get sued I’ll deny it ’til the day I day.