{"id":1148,"date":"2007-01-05T06:21:00","date_gmt":"2007-01-05T06:21:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/?p=1148"},"modified":"2007-01-05T06:21:00","modified_gmt":"2007-01-05T06:21:00","slug":"elevator-exposition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/uncategorized\/elevator-exposition\/","title":{"rendered":"Elevator exposition"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I.<\/p>\n<p>Man: That girl &#8212; her biscuits ain&#8217;t fully baked.<br \/>Other Man: Shake &#8216;n&#8217; Bake!<br \/>Man: But nobody helped.<\/p>\n<p>II.<\/p>\n<p>I stepped onto the empty elevator, going down, and it smelled like fresh fart. It wasn&#8217;t stifling, but it saturated the small space and didn&#8217;t seem to dissipate during the entire three-second journey. The whole ride down I just knew that as soon as I stepped off onto the first floor, someone would be there waiting \u2014 someone I knew and worked with \u2014 to step onto the fart-clouded elevator, thinking to him\/herself that the least I could have done was held it until I got to the restroom.<\/p>\n<p>No one was waiting to get on.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I. Man: That girl &#8212; her biscuits ain&#8217;t fully baked.Other Man: Shake &#8216;n&#8217; Bake!Man: But nobody helped. II. I stepped onto the empty elevator, going down, and it smelled like fresh fart. It wasn&#8217;t stifling, but it saturated the small space and didn&#8217;t seem to dissipate during the entire three-second journey. The whole ride down I just knew that as soon as I stepped off onto the first floor, someone would be there waiting \u2014&hellip; <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1148","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1jWWl-iw","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1148","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1148"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1148\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1148"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1148"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1148"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}