{"id":1322,"date":"2007-03-29T14:28:00","date_gmt":"2007-03-29T14:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/?p=1322"},"modified":"2007-03-29T14:28:00","modified_gmt":"2007-03-29T14:28:00","slug":"oh-my-god-im-having-company-tomorrow","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/the-family\/oh-my-god-im-having-company-tomorrow\/","title":{"rendered":"Oh my god, I&#8217;m having company tomorrow"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>There is a time in every slob&#8217;s life when she is struck with an acute pang of realization that, in less than 24 hours, there will be actual people \u2014 family members, no less \u2014 coming into her apartment and making themselves at home for many, many hours. Such a realization floods the brain with recognition of previously untapped talents, such as eagle-eye vision (&#8220;Holy crap, that is a huge dust bunny dancing under my bed&#8221;) and hyper-sensitive olfactory glands (&#8220;The kitchen certainly does smell assy this morning&#8221;).<\/p>\n<p>So, as soon as I complete my computer-assisted search for the &#8220;Easy&#8221; button (nope, nothing here), I guess I&#8217;d better get to work making this place I live in a little more inhabitable for humans who might not have the proper immunities built up.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There is a time in every slob&#8217;s life when she is struck with an acute pang of realization that, in less than 24 hours, there will be actual people \u2014 family members, no less \u2014 coming into her apartment and making themselves at home for many, many hours. Such a realization floods the brain with recognition of previously untapped talents, such as eagle-eye vision (&#8220;Holy crap, that is a huge dust bunny dancing under my&hellip; <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[85],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1322","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-the-family"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1jWWl-lk","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1322","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1322"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1322\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1322"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1322"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1322"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}