1. Periodically spill coffee all over yourself and your office furniture to ensure a warm and cozy lingering scent at all times.<\/p>\n
2. Make eye contact with all horses you see on the interstate.<\/p>\n
3. Buy a loaf of Italian bread and cut into slices that you only eat right before bedtime.<\/p>\n
4. Test your dog’s love for you by applying a charcoal mask and making quick, uncertain movements around her.<\/p>\n
5. When lying in bed and drinking out of a wine glass, use your expensive and allergic-to-liquid smartphone as a coaster right next to you. <\/p>\n
6. Time your annual mental breakdown for the third quarter so you’ll have a better chance of having met your deductible by then.<\/p>\n
7. Age five is the PERFECT age to have The Talk* with your child.<\/p>\n
8. Use coffee with creamer as creamer.<\/p>\n
9. There is<\/i> actually a silent I in team, nestled uncomfortably between the E and A, and only you<\/i> can see it and hear its anguished cries.<\/p>\n
10. No matter how inexpensive the Groupon, never ever opt in to a slaycation.<\/p>\n
*The Talk is when you tell a child that he HAS to eat the boring part of Lucky Charms and not just the marshmallows<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
1. Periodically spill coffee all over yourself and your office furniture to ensure a warm and cozy lingering scent at all times. 2. Make eye contact with all horses you see on the interstate. 3. Buy a loaf of Italian bread and cut into slices that you only eat right before bedtime. 4. Test your dog’s love for you by applying a charcoal mask and making quick, uncertain movements around her. 5. When lying in… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[68],"tags":[2346,1027,2344,2345],"class_list":["post-7520","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-randomosity","tag-hacks","tag-life","tag-life-hacks","tag-lifehacks"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1jWWl-1Xi","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7520","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7520"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7520\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7546,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7520\/revisions\/7546"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7520"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7520"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theogeo.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7520"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}