Jack’s pushing ten pounds and Sally has just eeked over six. Nov. 8 has been deemed the day they will get snipped so that we don’t end up with any (devastatingly adorable) inbred kittens. Project 365
[for Monday, OCt. 29] I love this crap. Probably because it’s pure sugar. Project 365
If the crack that you recently smoked is seeping out of your widened, red, wet eyes so that I can spot you from across the room and know instantly that you’re a crackhead who’s about to say something to me, even if it’s as lovely as, “You got a name to go with that pretty face?” do not be surprised if I laugh, embarrassed, and say, “Ha, no!” because I am merely standing there debating…
[for Sunday, Oct. 28] The crowd was light (where were all the record vendors?) but the day was gorgeous and there’s not much that tops sitting in the sun, listening to music. Even the sad songs. Project 365
I ripped off an idea I saw on the wire. The problem was that my big pumpkin was not nearly big enough. But, well, you make do with $4 pumpkins from Easy Way, you know? So just pretend that he’s chowing down on the little guy, and not that he has a very sad-looking tumor in his cheek.
[for Saturday, Oct. 27] I work with some crafty people. Project 365
This time last year, I was sitting at my desk at work, thinking about how gross I felt, and as I slurped down the last sugary mouthful of a canned Coke, I realized — as the clouds parted and the angels sang and God stroked his honky bearded chin in approval — that soda was going to have to go. So that very moment I resolved to make that Coke my last. Ever. And to…
Brittney wrote a little while back about her crush on the pomegranate, and someone commented that it seems like a whole lotta work for a little bit of fruit. It’s technically true, I suppose, but how lovely and meditative to stand over a bowl of water, your hands submerged, gently coaxing each seed from its little cubby and then discarding the pulp. When you’re done and you’ve cleared away the cloudy water and the bits…
I just drove 20 minutes in a hooptie with two mewling cats to the vet for booster shots, only to be informed when I got there that all the doctors had just left for their two-hour lunch breaks, and could I come back at 2? Um, no. Look, Universe, I know I’m not in charge, but that is some stupid shit. Make those doctors stagger their breaks, wouldja?
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