Can’t sleep. Got a lot on my mind and no real good way to say any of it. But the thoughts keep me awake anyway. They need oxygen so they can burn up and leave me alone. Saw a good show tonight. Young crowd. So many tall people or maybe I am shrinking. So many small and measured movements to the beats, hair stringy with sweat. Harshing my mellow, naturally, was That Guy. You know,…
There are people who used to be in my life who aren’t in it anymore. And I miss them.
From ye olde Formspring: I’ve never introduced myself to you, in person at least. I think you are intelligent, attractive, a wonderfully acerbic wit, creative, enviable, enigmatic, intriguing, and constantly searching. What’s an ideal fella to you? Hot dang! I like fellas who heap on the sweet words. That’s pretty much ideal. :) (
Got a real “fuck the world” current running through the noggin tonight. This horrible mood is a hog and damn near everyone and everything around me has been slopping it lately: Little chunks and pieces of shit that conspire to send me over the edge. No one’s any different than they were the day before; I just managed to let the ol’ hog stall, so to speak, stink up the place. It’ll run its course…
Me: will you be my life coach in 2010? i need to turn this ship around. Nick: you and me we’re like cavier, it takes a refined pallette and a sense of self importance to choke us down and pretend we taste good hmmm thats not a good metaphor
I had a moment to myself in the wee hours of Monday morning, when I went outside and sat in the driveway of my parents’ place and listened to the rising symphony of insects and night birds as they called to each other from the shadows. I grew up in the country but I never quite got used to the country dark. Country dark is dark. Impenetrable and vast. It was weird at first but…
It didn’t work out. I’m trying to be okay with that.
I am on the balcony, laptop pulsing heat onto my uncovered legs, nose stuffy from a summer stress cold, red wine (Malbec) in a Graceland mug on the window ledge behind me, three citronella candles and a mosquito coil flickering around me, yet I see the mosquitoes in silhouette against my screen, darting here and there and up and down and, occasionally, settling on a patch of skin still enough to penetrate and make me…
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