me: i have something i want to share with you
are you ready?
it’s a list of the first names of the [school name redacted because I am scared of Christian-school retribution] varsity cheer squad
are you fucking ready?
this says everything a person needs to know about upper-class southernness
Mike: ?
me: ready?
OK
Mike: READY
me: justice
lauren
taylor
jordan
shelby
shelby
laney
madi
lydia
mckenna
Mike: lol
me: dani
kelly
kelsey
andi
daly
I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP
the end
*applause*
Mike: They should just name all of them the same
Like just number them
me: like in the oblongs
the debbies