it's true — I'm crazy

5.5

ph5.5

I’ve been eyeing my bathroom soap for weeks now, wondering why the hell the manufacturers opted to prominently include the soap’s PH balance on the bottle. Almost like it might sway some frantic soap-buyer to pick Select Brand over some other generic crap — let’s see, they both come in cucumber melon, but Select Brand’s soap has a PH balance of 5.5!!!.

I kept trying to come up with more useful things the bottle designers could have put in that little oval. Maybe that neat Jesus optical illusion …

jesus

… or even the time-dependent Schroedinger equation for one spatial dimension …

equation

… but then I actually started reading about soap and I realized that liquid soap generally has a lower and more skin-friendly PH than bar soap, so bragging about a PH balance of 5.5 is actually kinda legit, even if casual soap-buyers are oblivious, and all my snark melted away into a sticky pool of new knowledge.

Fucking internet.

4 thoughts on “5.5”

  1. *I laughed out loud!* Rolling Stone raves.

    I have extended a welcome to my blog. I have started writing again and the three that start after a year’s absence have caused quite a bit of controversy.

    I would also like to cordially invite Tamara to view my blog, however, I cannot, due to lack of email address info. Tamara, it’s up to you, sister.

  2. Crap, I meant to get back to you re: the sitemeter. Check out sitemeter.com and just follow the instructions for blogspot blogs. It’s pretty easy. Let me know if it trips you up.

  3. Remember the Guide to Getting It On‘s recommendation for, um, tastier nethers? A lower pH means less sizzle in your meat.

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