You know your singlehood has reached critical mass…
… when your mother, who has volunteered to do your laundry, offers to give you money so you can buy yourself some sexier underwear.
Fran Moments the family why am I telling you this?
Category: why am I telling you this?
project 365 (2009) why am I telling you this?
Day 51: Vitamin E
My lips are broken. I am trying to fix them because I need them. [Project 365]
the family vacation why am I telling you this?
The day will come, the sun will rise, and we’ll be fine
The last bit of my time in the mountains was considerably better than the first bit. Wednesday, my dad and grandmother and I headed eastward in my car (which was a trooper) to scale the mountain and turn around in Cherokee, N.C. The weather was heavy and wet and temperamental, but we braved it anyway. The dampness saturated the colors, but when the fog set in, it was hard to see anything through a lens…
why am I telling you this?
I’m sure this doesn’t mean anything
I settled into the jacuzzi and quickly ran out of hot water. I turned the jets on and realized that they were far too loud to run at 3 a.m., in case our downstairs neighbors might actually want to sleep. So I laid there in still, lukewarm water for fifteen minutes. Turns out I can only hold my breath underwater for fifty seconds before I start to panic.
musings randomosity why am I telling you this?
Moment of whatever the opposite of clarity is
For a few hours now, I’ve been nursing cup after cup of Jamaican coffee. I guess that’s what it’s called — it’s coffee plus brandy plus rum. That’s what The Internet calls it, anyway. I have to add milk and sugar because I don’t want hair on my chest. Well, more hair. It’s a delicious concoction for a chilly autumn night and it makes me want to wear ridiculous multi-colored socks and wear a slanket.…
dreams politics why am I telling you this?
This election has officially driven me insane. Er. Insaner.
Last night I dreamed that I had awesome clandestine closet sex with Barack Obama at a party. And then I felt really, really bad for doing such a thing to Michelle.
politics Uncategorized videos why am I telling you this?
Body politic
What a week this has been. I feel like complete crap. I called out sick Wednesday with some head trouble and today I’m at home in my sweats, watching football (it’s a bit more palatable now that I’m on the fantasy football horse), battling the barf monster. This is a real bummer, as I had big plans for tonight. Also, I don’t like hanging around the house, puking. I don’t know what’s going on with…
why am I telling you this?
…
Tonight I tried to edit some video in iMovie and ended up screaming profanities at my computer screen. Sometimes I let the stupidest shit get to me. And by “sometimes” I mean “always.”
news why am I telling you this?
The end of the world
I got in to work today and saw this fortune peeking out from under my mouse pad, and for a brief, delusional moment, thought that it was a sign from The Cosmos, a comforting hug from The Universe, an obliging reacharound from Fate, and I got to feeling kind of — dare I say — upbeat. I wondered where it had come from, who had left it for me, and what he/she meant by it.…
Bitchy McComplainsalot why am I telling you this?
Trippin’
Today I took a little tumble in the liquor store. Literally. You know, I’ve spent enough time rambling about my stupid life on the internet that I just about had myself convinced that I couldn’t really be embarrassed anymore. Ha. Nothing like a good old-fashioned falling down to pour a nice little cocktail of humility and shame over your head. Still, it made me laugh. Once you recover and move far, far away from the…
You must be logged in to post a comment.